Monday Mix: LUSH Lovely Jubblies (Yes, It’s What You Think); Sales

By Voxy  

You knew it was coming, right? It’s been awhile since we’ve had a post about how we can all become more boobalicious. Never fear, LUSH is here, with their new Lovely Jubblies breast cream.

[Bullwinkle: “Hey, Rocky! Watch me pull a rabbit out of this hat!” Rocky: “Again?“]

Yes, it’s another Magic Breast Cream. And in case you are wondering exactly how far LUSH is going to go with the descriptions (and you are, you know you are), allow me to share the details from the website.

Keep your knockers in tit top shape

Dirty pillows feeling too cushy?

Introducing our brilliant breast cream, packed full of tightening meadowsweet infusion and firming tiger lily petals to help your girls fight the forces of gravity. We add heaps of beeswax and organic oils like almond and avocado to soften your melons (and to make it even harder to keep the boys at bay!) We think everyone deserves a pair of lovely jubblies.

Irresistible, Floral Fragrance

Smooth a generous amount of Lovely Jubblies over your décolletage area to tone down the wiggle and leave your cleavage smelling like a fresh floral bouquet of orange blossom, rose, jasmine and ylang ylang.

Tiger Lily Petals

Tiger lilies have astringent properties and are traditionally used to tighten the skin, making them perfect for firming up wobbly bits.

Fresh Rose Infusion

Rose is brilliant at soothing and gently toning the delicate skin of your décolletage area, leaving it with a fresh, floral fragrance.

First, I call bullshit. Second, eeew. Third, just in case you haven’t had enough, LUSH’s 2010 summer issue of LUSH TIMES (their quarterly catalog) features a contest to win a $500 LUSH gift card — and all you have to do is tell them what you call your “jubblies” and why. Oh, and you have to include a photo. It doesn’t say whether it has to include your jubblies. It actually doesn’t even say that it has to include your face. Maybe it is supposed to be a jubblies-only shot.

In case you want to purchase this concoction, it retails for $24.95 at LUSH stores and online.

Sales!

OK, I missed announcing the Tarte F&F sale, which is 40% off with code FFAUG, and which ends today. Sorry, ladies. However — as usual, Tarte’s website is so sold out that there’s really no point in going over to have a peek.

HauteLook has Mario Badescu today and Blinc tomorrow. All sales start at 11 am Eastern/8 am Pacific.

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9 Comments

  1. avatar Francie
    Posted August 10, 2010 at 1:32 pm | Permalink | Reply

    Who the heck names their tits?

    [heads out to look for tiger lily blossoms to rub on Everest and K2…] Oops! : }

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  2. Posted August 9, 2010 at 7:54 pm | Permalink | Reply

    Well, I confess that years ago I used to use Clarins products for décolleté, and actually found them to be beneficial. When I got the email from Lush I rolled my eyes at the name and descriptions, but if I had the disposable income for such things at the moment, I’d probably pick some up. Not because I feel bad about my girl-parts, at all, but because I do think that the décolleté area has skin care needs, in terms of firmness and elasticity, that make it a little different from other areas of the body.

    I don’t feel badly about my under-eye area, either, but I do use specifically formulated products for it. Granted, none of the ones I’ve seen use silly, over-the-top wink-wink language to describe the product or its application. But I cut Lush a fair bit of slack because I do love a lot of their products.

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  3. avatar prof_gnu
    Posted August 9, 2010 at 1:09 pm | Permalink | Reply

    I hate hate hate that people out there are trying to make us feel about perfectly nice body parts. Breast cream! What is next?

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  4. avatar marigolds
    Posted August 9, 2010 at 11:49 am | Permalink | Reply

    Gross and stupid. Who are they, Austin Powers? Also: my tits are fine like they are, thanks, Lush.

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    • avatar a biologist
      Posted August 9, 2010 at 10:07 pm | Permalink | Reply

      I thought of Austin Powers too. eeeewwww.

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  5. avatar chaosbydesign
    Posted August 9, 2010 at 9:47 am | Permalink | Reply

    LUSH is a UK company and maybe cultural norms re: language use are different

    No! No, no, no. We don’t speak like this! It is way over the top, and actually puts me off buying the product (not that I’m exactly in the market for breast cream anyway, but you know what I mean).

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    • avatar Voxy
      Posted August 9, 2010 at 10:07 am | Permalink | Reply

      Yes, I was hoping you would chime in! It puts me off too, but you just never know.

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  6. avatar JD
    Posted August 9, 2010 at 9:14 am | Permalink | Reply

    Does the over use of body euphemisms, like the Lush ad and contest, bother anyone else?

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    • avatar Voxy
      Posted August 9, 2010 at 9:19 am | Permalink | Reply

      Me, for sure. They use even more that I didn’t include. It’s sophomoric.

      OTOH, LUSH is a UK company and maybe cultural norms re: language use are different?

      (I’m sure one of our readers from across the pond can help us out on that one…)

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